Compassion
When you choose compassion over any other choice, you naturally elevate your consciousness. When you sit down to meditate, after a random act of kindness or a show of compassion, you will discover that your mind is naturally quieter than usual. It starts to gravitate towards its natural state. This peace is already present in your heart like fragrance in rose.
Truthfulness
Between truth and compassion, I personally choose compassion. That is not to say that I would tell a lie but I would rather hurt myself than hurt the other person. Putting the other person before yourself, that's what compassion is. Truth on the other hand is putting your principle before the other person. Sometimes that is more important.
Once, Prince Abhaya asked Buddha if he ever spoke harsh and disagreeable words. At first, Buddha said there was no categorical yes or no answer. However, when pressed by Abhaya, the Venerable One, referring to himself in third person as Tathagata (the one gone beyond) spoke:
Why is that? Because the Tathagata has compassion for living beings.39 It’s hard to find a better and clearer teaching on truth. If our words are true, factual, beneficial but not endearing or agreeable, we should think a million times before stating such truth as it’s unlikely to accomplish anything at all. It’ll hurt the other person and won’t benefit them in any way.
Next only to compassion, truth is the most potent quality of a true saint, a noble human being. Next time you are tempted to tell a lie, just pause for a moment, reflect on it and choose your words carefully. It’ll go a long way in ensuring that your speech, thoughts and actions are in harmony.
Gratitude
Being Grateful to God
Some people are grateful to God, to the Supreme Soul, to someone they feel is up there. It can give them a huge psychological boost, help them survive difficult phases in life, give them the motivation to stay course among numerous other benefits. Those who believe in the existence of God, regardless of the religion they follow, have someone they can be grateful to. Even daily prayer is a form of gratitude. Being grateful to God is not complete gratitude, though. Imagine being thankful to the mother who is never careless, indifferent or irresponsible towards her children. It is of little use. Far more important than being grateful to God is to be grateful to his children, his creation. This leads to the gratitude of the second type.
Being Grateful to Others
Love and gratitude are soulmates; happiness and harmony are their offspring. It is not possible to be grateful unless you accept that someone has done something for you. If you feel, out of ego or ignorance, that it was your right, you will fail to feel grateful. Consequently, you will not experience any happiness, much less peace and bliss. Any relationship with gratitude present in it is bound to flourish. Gratitude is not always about grand gestures, it may range from a sincere thank you to an act of extraordinary compassion. The important thing to remember is that you must consciously express your gratitude without any expectations for reciprocation; it is hard but doable. True gratitude makes one generous, compassionate and infinitely loving.
Practice of gratitude lends incredible emotional strength. If you are emotionally strong, you can succeed at anything, anything at all. Gratitude makes you emotionally pure and such purity in turn allows you to love unconditionally.
Empathy
But empathy is about just being there. It is the art of easing the pain of the other person by just being there for them in the most non-judgmental manner. Empathy is about being a good listener.
Nature has bestowed upon us an extraordinary emotion, empathy. It is the seed of compassion. Simply put, empathy is a genuine effort to see the world from the perspective of the other person. It is to step into their shoes to see where exactly it hurts. Empathy requires that we empty our mind and listen to the other person with our whole being. No understanding is possible unless we take in all that the other person is trying to tell us.
You don’t have to feel a certain way to act a certain way. The reverse is more practical and effective; start acting a certain way and you’ll start feeling that way. Empathy is an act before it becomes an emotion. It is, however, not possible to develop a sense of empathy without being sensitive towards others around us. In fact, it's hard to practice any virtue without having a degree of sensitivity.
A good meditator is always mindful of his thoughts, actions and words. One of the most beautiful rewards of meditation is that it makes you more sensitive. It’s a natural by-product.
Sensitivity is knowing the difference between being emphatic and being empathic. As they say, resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant with the weak and wrong. Sometime in your life, you will have been all of these.
Humility
As you begin to shed your ego, you become humble naturally. A humble mind is a beautiful mind. It's far more receptive to spiritual growth and attainment than an egoist mind, no matter how learned.
Faith
Faith is designed to give you the confidence, the courage to lead your life with grace and conviction. It doesn’t mean we can just confess and be done with our bad karma, rather, we should have the strength to do the right karma at the first place.
Faith is the understanding that not everything is in my control. I'll do everything in my reach to do whatever I can about things that are in my control and leave the rest in the hands of this vast universe.
As Reinhold Niebuhr wrote in The Serenity Prayer.
When you choose compassion over any other choice, you naturally elevate your consciousness. When you sit down to meditate, after a random act of kindness or a show of compassion, you will discover that your mind is naturally quieter than usual. It starts to gravitate towards its natural state. This peace is already present in your heart like fragrance in rose.
Truthfulness
Between truth and compassion, I personally choose compassion. That is not to say that I would tell a lie but I would rather hurt myself than hurt the other person. Putting the other person before yourself, that's what compassion is. Truth on the other hand is putting your principle before the other person. Sometimes that is more important.
Once, Prince Abhaya asked Buddha if he ever spoke harsh and disagreeable words. At first, Buddha said there was no categorical yes or no answer. However, when pressed by Abhaya, the Venerable One, referring to himself in third person as Tathagata (the one gone beyond) spoke:
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be un-factual, untrue, unbeneficial (or: not connected with the goal), un-endearing and disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, un-endearing and disagreeable to others, he does not say them.
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, but un-endearing and disagreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them.
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be un- factual, untrue, unbeneficial, but endearing and agreeable to others, he does not say them.
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, but endearing and agreeable to others, he does not say them.
- In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, and endearing and agreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them.
Why is that? Because the Tathagata has compassion for living beings.39 It’s hard to find a better and clearer teaching on truth. If our words are true, factual, beneficial but not endearing or agreeable, we should think a million times before stating such truth as it’s unlikely to accomplish anything at all. It’ll hurt the other person and won’t benefit them in any way.
Next only to compassion, truth is the most potent quality of a true saint, a noble human being. Next time you are tempted to tell a lie, just pause for a moment, reflect on it and choose your words carefully. It’ll go a long way in ensuring that your speech, thoughts and actions are in harmony.
Gratitude
Being Grateful to God
Some people are grateful to God, to the Supreme Soul, to someone they feel is up there. It can give them a huge psychological boost, help them survive difficult phases in life, give them the motivation to stay course among numerous other benefits. Those who believe in the existence of God, regardless of the religion they follow, have someone they can be grateful to. Even daily prayer is a form of gratitude. Being grateful to God is not complete gratitude, though. Imagine being thankful to the mother who is never careless, indifferent or irresponsible towards her children. It is of little use. Far more important than being grateful to God is to be grateful to his children, his creation. This leads to the gratitude of the second type.
Being Grateful to Others
Love and gratitude are soulmates; happiness and harmony are their offspring. It is not possible to be grateful unless you accept that someone has done something for you. If you feel, out of ego or ignorance, that it was your right, you will fail to feel grateful. Consequently, you will not experience any happiness, much less peace and bliss. Any relationship with gratitude present in it is bound to flourish. Gratitude is not always about grand gestures, it may range from a sincere thank you to an act of extraordinary compassion. The important thing to remember is that you must consciously express your gratitude without any expectations for reciprocation; it is hard but doable. True gratitude makes one generous, compassionate and infinitely loving.
Practice of gratitude lends incredible emotional strength. If you are emotionally strong, you can succeed at anything, anything at all. Gratitude makes you emotionally pure and such purity in turn allows you to love unconditionally.
Empathy
But empathy is about just being there. It is the art of easing the pain of the other person by just being there for them in the most non-judgmental manner. Empathy is about being a good listener.
Nature has bestowed upon us an extraordinary emotion, empathy. It is the seed of compassion. Simply put, empathy is a genuine effort to see the world from the perspective of the other person. It is to step into their shoes to see where exactly it hurts. Empathy requires that we empty our mind and listen to the other person with our whole being. No understanding is possible unless we take in all that the other person is trying to tell us.
You don’t have to feel a certain way to act a certain way. The reverse is more practical and effective; start acting a certain way and you’ll start feeling that way. Empathy is an act before it becomes an emotion. It is, however, not possible to develop a sense of empathy without being sensitive towards others around us. In fact, it's hard to practice any virtue without having a degree of sensitivity.
A good meditator is always mindful of his thoughts, actions and words. One of the most beautiful rewards of meditation is that it makes you more sensitive. It’s a natural by-product.
Sensitivity is knowing the difference between being emphatic and being empathic. As they say, resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant with the weak and wrong. Sometime in your life, you will have been all of these.
Humility
As you begin to shed your ego, you become humble naturally. A humble mind is a beautiful mind. It's far more receptive to spiritual growth and attainment than an egoist mind, no matter how learned.
Faith
Faith is designed to give you the confidence, the courage to lead your life with grace and conviction. It doesn’t mean we can just confess and be done with our bad karma, rather, we should have the strength to do the right karma at the first place.
Faith is the understanding that not everything is in my control. I'll do everything in my reach to do whatever I can about things that are in my control and leave the rest in the hands of this vast universe.
As Reinhold Niebuhr wrote in The Serenity Prayer.
God, grant me the serenity to
accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.
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